Goethe’s Fairy Tale

The other day I ordered an essay from you with these instructions:
1. In the Fairy Tale, light appears in many forms, including the light of Gold as well as the light of The Old Man’s Lamp. How are Gold and Light intimately related to each other throughout the Fairy Tale? Explain the ambiguous value of Gold/Knowledge in human hands, bringing illumination and wisdom on the one hand (the snake) and death and suffering on the other (Mops). How does the Light of Art shed by the lamp in the hands of the Old Man/Ancient Poetry provide a counterpart to the light of Intellect in the Fairy Tale? Why does the Old Man’s lamp only give light when another light is already present? How does the Power of Light banish the destructive Shadow of the Giant at end of the tale, transforming him into a sundial?

2. Goethe’s Fairy Tale is set in a landscape divided by a river that acts as a boundary between two lands – the Land of the Real and the Land of the Ideal. By the end of the Fairy Tale, there is a permanent bridge spanning the river, joining these two Lands together. What are the three temporary ways that make it possible to cross between the Land of the Real and the Land of the Ideal? How does the sacrifice, embodied in the actions of the Green Snake, bring about the transformation, permanently uniting the two lands? How do you understand the creation of a new human community as the outcome of the Fairy Tale? Is this the ideal state of society that both Schiller and Goethe were striving to attain?

My notes:Please pick either of the essay topics for Goethe’s fairy tale, The Green snake and the Beautiful Lily.
The questions are to help you formulate a claim, you don’t have to answer each and every one.

Introduction-make a claim, should be controversial, not obvious
Body-engage in analysis working with evidence that contradicts idea.
Conclusion-restate claim. Arrive at a sense of larger significance. Doesn’t have to be big but non obvious.

However, I received a D as a grade. It wasn’t even proofread and cited wrong!I also think the writer worked off both topics and I specifically asked for her/him to choose one.Please revise and edit so I can pass. If I had the time I would, so I need your help.

The following is the email I received from my teacher telling my the reason for the D

*Defne, in the paper you appear to pursue two different claims. On the one hand you announce that you will focus on the light of reason at the beginning while towards the end of the paper you attempt to give an account of the transformation that most characters undergo in the course of the FT. The problem with this approach is that it is unfocused. In a paper of this length I would have liked for you to focus on one of these ideas and pursue in depth. As a result much of your paper is largly devoted to summary rather than analysis.
In addition, your paper lacks overall structure and coherence. You jump from one idea to another without explaining a transition between them. Furthermore, your interpretation of the FT seems to be based on a misunderstanding. You seem to claim that the Snake is adversely affected by knowledge. That is not the case. While it is true that light of reason is a double-edged sword in the FT, it has an adverse effect on the Pug but leads to a positive transformation for the snake. In other words reason in the FT is a transcended force. Both the Pug and the Snake belong to the realm of nature. However only one of them benefits from the enlightenment bestowed by reason. Based on this one could argue that reason destroys the simple harmony of nature, while simultaneously leading to a higher plane of consciousness.
Finally, your paper is filled with an overwhelming amount of spelling and grammatical mistakes. In addition to the structure of the draft as whole you need to work on structure of individual sentences. Because we did not get a chance to meet before your was due, I would like to talk to you before you hand in the next draft. I would strongly urge to see a writing tutor to help with the paper. You also need to go over proper citation*

D
I will also send you jpgs of her comments on the actual essay.
Below is the essay itself:

Persuasive Analysis: Goethe’s ‘The Green Snake and the Beautiful Lily’
Fairy tale series as narrated by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe leaves much to be admired especially when analyzed from a philosophical point of view. In this regard, there are a lot of twist and puns that make reading “The Fairy Tale of the Green Snake and the Beautiful Lily” little more exciting than it is to read “Cinderella” or “Snow White” related series (Goethe, 1993). The fairy tale exhibits a deeper connection between the actual world of leadership and personal acceptance, the five senses and personal desires. The author is also categorical in the use of symbolism which later results into a happy ending for the entire persona. The main character of the fairy tale is represented by the Green snake which is portrayed to be keen on self-advancement and this ushers in a new phase of self-discovery. This phase is exposed after the fair green snake eats gold particles thrown along its monstrous chasm. From this instance, the snake admires its new luminous body which is also transparent, as this essay proceeds to analyze. Accordingly, the claim that clumsy people have less wisdom but much knowledge is exhibited.
From the fairy tale, instances of light are exemplified by glittering light from gold as well as the light from the old man’s lamp could be contentious in its relation to human attributes of Gold/Knowledge in human hands, bringing illumination and wisdom on the one hand (the snake) and death and suffering on the others. This could be attributed to the realization that light spectrums are essential in illuminating the day and breaking the monotony inherent in the passage of time between day and night. Instances of sunrise and sunset further cement the admirable characteristic that light from the sun is symbolic of new lease of life to the green snake which quickly gets fed up being in its new luminous and transparent body. This instance of light could be related to instances of assimilation and the resultant cultural shock that comes with alienation. Whereas the snake thought the two gentlemen, Will-o-Wisps could accommodate it as a sister cousin, they disparaged her forced appearance which leads the snake into having self-esteem issues. The clumsy Green Snake finally becomes nostalgic of its former self and relents to search for its roots. From the instances it is prudent to conclude that light has been used to symbolize new hopes and aspirations that come with self-development.
Looking at light from another angle, the tale talks of a certain kind of light that is dependent on the availability of another light. Apparently this incidence is a replica of the knowledge that human beings have exposed themselves to. The relationship of the tale is further resembled to the biblical story in generations where the snake was used by Satan as a symbol of worldly wisdom. The insurgence of knowledge and wisdom have thus been used to create death and suffering among human beings who are left in a haze on the suitable types of illumination to trust. This further augments the contentious issues raised by the need to relate different sources of light to freedom, wisdom and knowledge.
Apparently, the light used in the tale could be used to describe instances of confusion that marked the early phases of human freedom. It is during the early stages of industrialization and modernization that political powers relating to governance were not clear. At that time governance structures had not been set hence there could be a possibility that there was much light emanating from the power confusions that marked the early stages of human liberalization. Looking back at history, Goethe wrote the tale during the French Revolution which implies that the tale was motivated by power divisions that led to confusion. Fearing for his life, the author decided to use literature styles of symbolism to cover for the power gaps created by lack of leadership after the French revolution. It could also be argued that power struggles relating to shifts from communism and capitalism could be the intent of the author in identifying several sources of light in the story.
With the discovery that the Old Man’s lamb could only light when illuminated by another source of light, there emerges a counterpart of the intellectual knowledge or wisdom when the fairy green snake appears. The Light that it possesses by the Old Man is thus made to shine through the temple and this helps the Light study and discovers the ground on which the temple is built. Literally this could mean the onset of the journey of self-discovery. By stating that the Old Man’s lamp can only give light when another light is present is subjective in the sense that it could mean that the process to self-discovery or advancement of wisdoms is a complex chain reaction which is triggered through learning in the simple sense that the Old Man’s lamp learns from others.
The hardest question emerges when asked to think of the implication caused by such infectious systems of learning and their efficacy in advancing the growth of knowledge and personal development. The gist of the argument therefore arises with the realization that knowledge is a continuous process and in case it is overpowered then consultations could help re-ignite the fire associated with knowledge gained. From the tale wisdom can be identified as a byproduct of knowledge because it grows with age. The Old Man is symbolic of this fact because he is seen to be of help to the will-o-wisps as well as the green snake and the four kings in the underground of the temple. An analysis of the four kings identifies them as being composed of different personal attributes. The first king was made of gold; the second silver; the third was bronze while the fourth was a combination of the three metals. Instinctively, it could mean that the world leadership is dominated by very different leaders as well as leadership styles. The gold king is symbolic of leaders focused on national development while the bronze king is associated with a mediocrity as bronze is a less valuable metal. The fourth king is balanced because he possesses qualities from all the other three kings.
There appears to be some technicalities at the beginning of the story especially when the Ferryman has to spend sleepless nights transporting people across the river. There exists valuable assets on both sides of the river for instance; the will-o-wisps are forced to wake up the tired Ferryman on their way to the other side of the river (Goethe, 1993). There is a dysfunctional bridge which they cannot cross. In addition, there are specific times in which the Ferryman can pass people across the bridge. In reality there is a dysfunctional aspect observable in the bridge. In real life scenarios, the tale is applicable to human beings who are torn apart between embracing modernity and conservatism. Even though both have valuable attributes, but one is more short-lived than the other. Comparing the tale to personal development there emerges a conflict of interest created by conscience. Just like the snake is haunted by the reality that its new luminous and transparent body is beautiful and that it has more appeal and power to perform tasks it could not perform in its real self, it is discontented with the fact that it has a hard time fitting in the real society.
Whereas it thought it would fit in the family of will-o-wisps with its current guise of a luminous body, the will-o-wisps are interested in getting a fair maid from the other side of the river. As such Goethe’s tale creates a scenario where the two lands need a permanent solution. This symbolically means that at times human beings have to decide which side to live on. It is therefore a personal choice to live on either the real side or the idea side of the river. With the creation of a permanent link between the two lands, the Ferryman loses his job and probably his daily bread too. This indicates how certain decisions are painful to human beings. Whereas other people have to make a painful choice and sacrifice for the sake of collective or individual freedom, there is need for rationality. As illustrated by the story when Goethe wallows from the land of senses to fairy tale, the old man and the beautiful lily are obliged to recuperate the prince’s life (Goethe, 1993).
The prince is forgiven of his lustful sins and accepted back into the world of reality. This is only after the prince is touched by the old man and the snake. The snake sacrifices its self because it could not fit in its ideal and real world which leads it into transforming into a pile of stones which are disbursed into the river which after sometime becomes a permanent bridge spanning the river. The Old Man’s wisdom is seen at work when he orders moves to be taken by the rest of the personas in the fairy tale. For instance, he directs the will-o-wisps to move towards the door of the temple which is still locked. The will-o-wisps embrace knowledge learnt from the green snakes to eat the gold and clear the doors clearing the passage. Magically, the temple is transplanted below the river and surfaces within the Ferryman’s hut where the hut turns and becomes a silver altar for the temple.
The three kings shower the newly married prince with gifts and restore their power. The fourth king is portrayed to be the weakest of the four when the will-o-wisps licks gold from the kings veins leaving him too weak to stand (Goethe, 1993). Beautiful lily is cleansed and purified and the spell that was previously cast on him was neutralized because of the green snakes sacrifice. The prince is happily wedded to the beautiful lily and at this moment all the personas are relieved of their ideal selves as their senses are driven back to reality. On looking outside they notice a permanent bridge spanning the river. The bridge is seen as a relief to all the people who were disguised in their ideal selves but upon gaining knowledge and personal values, they realize that reality is much better than living in pretext. The fairy tale is thus made relevant to our modern lives as it creates an understanding of the modern human societies and communities despite the much pressure of westernization. Both Schiller and Goethe are seen wreathing from relieve on the new found society where personal freedom is no longer subjugated by authorities but enhanced. The fairy tale further illustrates the need for self-acceptance which is bound to help people resolve problems associated with low self-esteem. This reiterates the claim that clumsy people have less wisdom but much knowledge.

Reference
Goethe, J. W. (1993). Goethe’s Fairy Tale of the Green Snake and the Beautiful Lily, Donald Maclean, translator. With a commentary by Adam McLean. Germany: Phanes Press