Gender Norms

The sociology of gender norm has been a prominent field in the academic literature as it explains why an individual behaves in a certain way. Quintessentially, the term gender signify the activities or things that an individual does or say that disclose them of having the status of girl, woman, man, or a boy. Still, it includes the sexuality part of it ‘eroticism’. Gender norms is a complex subject since it encompasses various characteristics of body language, facial expression, appearance, movement, dress code, and speech just to name a few. In this era, there is an increasing debate as to whether gender is a biological construct or social construct. A research conducted by Carpenter (22) has found that, gender norms has both social and biological construct. The two concepts cannot be separated as they determine why an individual behaves the way he or she does. The goal of this essay is to provide a comprehensive analysis of how strong gender norms are in the society. For this activity, I will identify a behavior (activity, speech pattern, dress, and body language) that clearly violate gender norm.

First, I will provide a brief description of the gender norm violation I committed. It was on a Friday night when my boyfriend took me for a date. I must admit that it was quite a long time since we had some special time together. We took dinner in Hilton Hotel and I was impressed by the services that the hotel offers. Prior to taking the dinner, I found myself pulling the chair out at the table for my boyfriend. Despite having good intentions to do so, everyone in the hotel stared at me. This bothered me since I could not understand the reason for this. After a deep evaluation and research I had done in sociology, I remembered the subject of gender norms. In the modern society, a man is expected to pull the chair for the woman and vice versa. Additionally, the woman is expected to enjoy the dinner without putting more effort on pulling the chair or the table. I agree on this subject since I was amazed by what I observed. One woman who was right beside me, stared at me and smiled. I was in a great shock since I had not fully comprehended what the laughter meant. However, as we continued with the dinner I realized I had violated gender norms.

From the ongoing discussion, it is important to carefully examine the possible reasons for the existence of this particular gender norm and why it exists. A research done by Carpenter (33) provides a historical background of this phenomenon. This research continues to argue that, in the 18^th, a man was expected to take care of his wife in all events and circumstances. On the other hand, the woman was expected to perform household chores and take care of children. Based on this analysis, it is evident that a man was expected to take care of a woman. This explains why men should pull chairs for women and not vice versa. The function that this norm serves is that, a woman is weaker vessel and thus should not perform tasks that are complex or involve much energy.

It was such a memorable event in my life. After pulling the chair, I felt privileged for having done such an action to someone I love. My boyfriend was so happy for the action and this challenged him to view things differently. However, I felt scared, silly, and embarrassed when people were staring at me. This changed my perceptive on the action I did. I realized that the society controls how one thinks and behaves. The experience I went through influenced my thinking on the gender norm and since then, I cannot do such an action. When leaving for dinner, my boyfriend carried my pulse and this shocked the public. My boyfriend was frightened and shy and as a result, he gave me back my pulse. Indeed, it was evident that my boyfriend action was influenced by the public interpretation of gender norms.

Categorically, there are a number of theories used to understand gender norm violation. In 1981, Sandra Bem established Gender Schema Theory to explain how people portray gender norms in the society (Carpenter 22). According to this theory, children learn how to behave from the environment they grow up or the culture they live in. Overall, the main assumption of this theory is that children behave in a certain way to fit in with the gender expectations and norms of their culture. With this, it is evident that most children view their fathers pulling the chairs for their mothers. From this theory, it is palpable that when a lady or woman pulls the chair for her boyfriend she violates gender norms in the society. Similarly, the society expects women to carry pulses. Thus, any man who carries a pulse is viewed differently. To some extent, gender role theory is established in the supposition that people are socially identified as females and males based on the roles they play in the society. This theory explains why the public smiled after my boyfriend carried the pulse and still when I pulled the chair for him.

Works Cited

Carpenter, Charli. Innocent Women and Children: Gender, Norms and the Protection of Civilians. Aldershot, England: Ashgate, 2006, Print.